The Day Before
Goodbyes. I am on an emotional roller coast today as I
prepared to leave for London in a few hours. I have rushed around, checked and
rechecked, and worked myself into a panic. Basically all the ear markers of
serenity and success! Ha ha. I can’t wait to leave (in fact I wish I could just
leave right now) but my stomach is a flurry of nervous butterflies. I’m still waiting for the funds from Gilman to be
deposited into my account. It is supposed to deposit a few days after I arrive.
I
could be surrounded by people who are any more comforting, supportive, and
loving. This never would have
been possible without the incredible generosity of so many people. My emotions
are running high and writing about this right now is humbling and overwhelming.
I cannot believe that it is really happening. I did it. All that work, blood,
sweat, and tears later and I am set and ready to go.
Hello from the
future. I remember this departure day really well. I threw up SOOOO many times
on the way to the airport. I had no idea why (turns out I had the flu then and
for days after I arrived).
I’m adding this
information in because the program thought that I was suffering from
homesickness or panic. I never get sick (I hadn’t at the flu in years because I
have an autoimmune disease that is super over active and prevents things like
the common cold and the flu). I didn’t recognize the symptoms and I wasn’t
throwing up food because I was too sick to shop.
I was emotionally
wrecked. I doubted myself, maybe I wasn’t STRONG enough for this trip. Maybe I
need to be sent home. I couldn’t stand it. Finally, they took me to the doctor
and I was diagnosed with the flu and sent home.
My advice is to talk
to people. Tell them exactly what is happening and that you need help. They
can’t put themselves in your shoes unless you describe your shoes to them.
No comments:
Post a Comment